----------------------------------------------- */ ----------------------------------------------- */ ----------------------------------------------- */ ----------------------------------------------- */ ----------------------------------------------- */ ----------------------------------------------- */ The Fabulous Adventures of Astera: Writer/Actress for Hire: Gifts for Guys

The Fabulous Adventures of Astera: Writer/Actress for Hire

Meet Astera (aka: me), a star in her own mind. Our plucky little heroine has embarked on not one but two difficult, low-paying career paths: writing and acting. Witness the menial jobs! The unreasonable demands! The quirky friends and family! And the glimmer of success just ahead! Through it all, Astera maintains her core beliefs: 1) She is destined to be fabulous 2) Everything is more fun with a cocktail.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Gifts for Guys

I am thinking back to the dating days of my life, and I remember how hard it was to buy just the right present for my boyfriend. It couldn't be anything too serious or personal...that would show that I was taking the relationship too seriously. But it couldn't be some silly joke present, either, because what if he got me something really nice? Then I would feel stupid. It was such a difficult balance to find something that said, "Hey, I really like you and think you're great, but it's not like I think we're going to get married or anything. Don't freak out. Whatever!"

I thought that once I got married, all those gift-giving concerns would simply melt away. How wrong I was. It turns out that my husband is harder to shop for than any boyfriend ever was!

Why is Mr. Pink so difficult, you ask? Well, for starters, we have totally different tastes. I like to dress up and be girly. For him, getting dressed up means putting on a button-down shirt with his jeans instead of a t-shirt. And he doesn't wear "fashion" jeans, either. Just regular, everyday jeans. Seriously, the boy has an allergy to nice slacks. So, you can imagine what a disaster it is if I try to buy him clothes. I think it's a nice sweater, he thinks it's something his grandpa might wear. And forget accesories. The man has three watches...a Citizen titanium one (which I bought him, after he picked it out), a Tag and a Rolex. That seems like plenty right there. And since I can't afford the $25,000 rose gold Jorg Hysek that he covets, what's the point, really?

All his hobbies are way too cool and esoteric for me, so it's difficult to shop for anything like that, too. For instance, he's into photography. But would he like a nice digital camera? Oh, no. It's got to be some vintage box camera or something like that. And he's got to have the special medium-format film to go with it. Seriously, he is bidding on some camera called a "Diana" on eBay right now. I've never even heard of such a thing! And don't even think about music. He downloads everything he wants from iTunes as soon as it becomes available. His iPod (the big one) is nearly full. Besides, I know very little about the music he likes. And it's not that I'm unwilling to learn. But when he knows so much about People Under the Stairs and daKAH and the like, what could I really add?

Forget trying to buy him anything to do with his profession. He's a designer, so anything that piques his interest, he buys right away in the name of "research." Funky design books? He's got them. Pattern making books? Yep, got those, too. Books about fonts? He actually has one called Helvetica: Homage to a Typeface. How hardcore can you get?

So apparently, I am a failure as a gift-giving wife. I usually just ask him what he wants and buy him something off his list, so it's never a surprise. For instance, he knows exactly what he's getting this year. It's not something I agree with, but it's something he really, really wants, so at least I know he'll be happy. (Motorcycle riding classes, so he can get his license, if you must know. He really wants a motorcyle, or a "donorcycle," as I like to call it. But he says I can take out a big life insurance policy on him. So comforting.) I won't be able to see his eyes light up with surprise on Christmas morning, but at least I'll know that he won't try to return my gift. And I guess that's something, after all.


  • At 2:31 PM, Blogger Bruingirl said…

    Motorcycle lessons, huh? What is it w/ guys and bikes??? Don't they know that it makes the life insurance premiums expensive??


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